Viviene's Birth Story

One year ago, we brought our sweet baby girl home from the hospital. Today, I'm recapping her birth story.

It was a Thursday night. I had just finished watching a movie on the couch and was getting up to go pee, per usual. As I made my way to the bathroom, I felt a gush of warm water. At 38 weeks 5 days, we were admitted to the hospital. We were having this baby! 

I started packing my hospital bag and called my Mom to update her. My water didn't break all at once but instead, it felt like small water balloons popping every now and then. I'd feel a pop followed by another gush of warm water. I went ahead and slid a brief on and applied an extra pad. I ended up having to change the pad out 3x over the course of 2 hours. It was wild how my water continued to leak slowly. 

Because of that, I didn't feel rushed. I knew this was my last opportunity to get the house ready for the baby, so I went into cleaning mode. I cleaned the bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, and finished washing the dishes. An hour later, Zac walked into the kitchen as I was wrapping up and said, "Can we leave for the hospital yet?!" 

A part of me kept waiting for the contractions to intensify at home, but they never did so we headed to the hospital and checked in at 2:30am.

Because I was currently 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant, they had to swab my cervix for amniotic fluid and wait for the results. Anything before 39 weeks is considered pre-term labor, so the swab test needs to be positive to be admitted for active labor. An hour later, we received positive results and were officially admitted to the labor and delivery unit. 

Between 2:30am and 7:00am, there was no change or progress. Contractions were far and few in between. At my 8:30am cervical check, I was 3cm dilated 60% effaced. The Doctor urged me to start Pitocin asap, but I was really resistant towards the suggestion. I feared it would make natural labor even more intense and painful. I delayed and asked if I could walk the hallways in hopes that labor would progress naturally and asked if we could re-evaluate things again within the hour. The nurse agreed. 

For the next 45 minutes, Zac and I walked the halls and stopped every few minutes to perform squats. I did so many squats in that hour, I think my legs were sorer than my baby birthing parts the next day LOL. Supposedly, squats are helpful in opening your pelvis and allowing the baby to drop. 

To no avail, the walk and squats were not a success. I returned to my room and was started on Pitocin at 10:00am. Every 20 minutes, Nurse Lauren would return to increase my Pitocin. By 11:00am I was starting to feel the contractions in my lower back. "Man oh man, labor here I come!" 

I was using an exercise ball to roll around on. Being in the bed was too uncomfortable, as all my pain was in my lower back. Soon, we were having contractions every 2-3 minutes. Some contractions were light, others were mild or severe. The more severe ones were beginning to come at regular intervals. I focused on my breathing and circled on my exercise ball until I could feel the wave of that contraction beginning to taper away. 

 It would be an intense 30-50 seconds and then the pain would fade away for 1-2 minutes. I would relish in that grace period between contractions like, "Yesss. Relief! Phew."

Nurse Lauren instructed me that I had the option to request a one-time dose of Fentanyl, if needed. She also reminded me that the epidural would have a waiting period of 1-hour, as I would have to be cycled through 2 bags of IV fluids prior to administration. Keeping those things in mind, I continued to reassure myself that I could do this. "Just one contraction at a time!" I said. 

I stayed focused on my breathing and reminded myself to relax when I felt myself getting tense. I focused on the music playing and attempted to tune everything and everyone out.

By 12:30pm, I’d reached my pain threshold. With little to no sleep, and having been awake for 24 hours, I could feel myself sinking into this dark space where I was overwhelmed by pain and fatigue. I could barely keep my eyes open anymore.

By this point, the contractions were beyond intense in my lower back. My Aunt was fanning me and my Mom and Zac were taking turns massaging my lower back. Without the massages, the pain would have been crippling but the continuous massaging made the contractions somewhat bearable. 

*Pro tip: Highly recommend you have a good back massager for labor.

I asked Mom to page for the nurse and ask about the Fentanyl, in hopes that it would provide me some relief and maybe the ability to take a short nap.

Nurse Lauren returned to the room. She had me transfer from the ball to the bed so she could administer an antibiotic to prevent infection due to the fact that my water had broken over 12-hours ago. She also wanted to perform another cervical check to see if I'd be a candidate for the Fentanyl. "9cm dilated!", she shouted. "No pain meds for you, unfortunately. We're past that point!" 

Suddenly, things started to speed up. They notified my doctor and a team of nurses entered my room and began prepping for delivery. 

"9cm dilated. Hallelujah!" I thought to myself. "I can do this!" But wow! I was so uncomfortable. With my Mom and Zac still massaging my back and my sisters at my side brushing my hair and whispering to me, "You got this!", I continued to focus on pushing through each contraction. 

My contractions were now 20-40 seconds apart and we were waiting on my Doctor to arrive. 

Suddenly, I felt an urge come over me. I told my Mom, "I need to push!" 

With my next contraction came a strong intensity that forced me to grip the handlebar and bear down. As I pushed, I could literally feel the baby shifting down into my pelvis towards my bottom. Within minutes of that push, the intensity of my contractions lightened. 

Finally, after hours of non-stop and intense contractions, I had finally found some relief. 

I shifted from my side to my back and felt like I could breathe again. Suddenly, I was aware of how dry my mouth was from all the labored breathing techniques.

A friend had warned me to pack lifesaver mints for this very reason, but I still felt like there was no way I could focus on dissolving a mint in my mouth and contractions. At some point, a nurse recommended I take shorter breaths versus longer breaths "because your body can’t contract through the shorter style of breathing." I had never heard that tip before but it seemed to make a difference! 

My doctor finally arrived and was prepped and ready for delivery. I began pushing! 

"1...5...10...15...", the Doctor counted. She was trying to kill me! I don't know who misinformed her that I was a free diver before this delivery, but they were lying! Lol. I was so lightheaded, everything was going black. I thought I was about to pass out. 

My Doctor asked if I was having another contraction? I lied and answered, "No."

*Currently dying from a lack of oxygen*

After I recovered, I got back into position, grabbed my legs, and began pushing. 

"1...5...10...15...", I swear my doctor counted to 20 before she finally said, "And RELAX!" 

The nurses pushed a mirror in front of my baby birthing parts and yelled, "Look in the mirror!", as I pushed again. The baby was crowning and I could see her dark hair! 

I pushed again! 

I could feel the blood rushing to my face again. I was feeling lightheaded and beginning to blackout. Zac looked at me and said, "Your face is really red!" and proceeded to blow air on me as though his mouth was a fan. Lol, we joke about that today and how I couldn't have done it without the extra air in my face. Thanks boo! 

After another big push, Zac yelled, "Don't stop! Her head is right there!" 

I channeled every single ounce of energy I had left into that FINAL push! 

FINALLY! 

Our baby girl was here! 

Viviene Rose weighed in at 6lbs 1oz; 19 inches long. Arriving on May 10th, 2019 at 2:00pm. 

Viviene let out a big cry as they placed her on my belly. Her eyes were wide open. She grabbed ahold of my gown as the nurse rubbed her down to clean her off. Meanwhile, I was still trying to catch my breath. 

*Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.*

Also, I'll take that mint now, Zac! The cottonmouth was real. 

After a couple of minutes, they took Viviene to to the other side of the room to record her weight and vitals while my Doctor stitched me up. Three tears. Yay me! 

A week before delivery, my Doctor had practically scared me when she described the different levels of tears a woman can experience at birth. My first question post-birth was, "Am I going to have to wear diapers for the rest of my life?"

 "No diapers," she reported. "AMEN," I cheered! 

They brought Viviene back over to me. Now that I was finally lucid and back in the moment, I looked at her again. What a surreal moment. 

I remember someone saying to me that for the duration of their pregnancy, that "I'm having a baby!" reality didn't set in for them until they saw the baby for the first time. 

I could 100% relate to that. 

For the first time, it felt real. She was actually here. We actually had a baby!

WOW!

Viviene came out hungry and ready to eat. I could relate. I was starving too! It had been well over 36-hours since our last meal. 

Viviene latched right away and seemed to know what she was doing. We did skin to skin while Zac left the room to make the birth announcement to my family in the waiting area. 

Post-delivery, the nurses were quick to make sure I was up and attempting to pee. 

 I had the urge to pee but couldn’t physically pee. 

The nurse turned the water faucet on and gave me five minutes alone. I sat there pushing on my bladder, trying to make myself pee, but it was almost impossible. Only a little trickled out. We'd try again later!

My nurses helped me put on my official new attire which included a pad and mesh panties. As they had me stand to pull everything up, my world went white. 

My ears began ringing and I felt myself buckling. 

The nurse cracked opened an alcohol stick and waved it under my nose. That hospital grade alcohol scent shot straight up my nostrils and hit me square in the middle of my forehead. Wowza! They had me take a couple deep whiffs before attempting to return me back to the bed. 

I felt like I'd been resuscitated. 

Anddd, I'm back folks! 

The nurse came in periodically for belly checks, which consisted of her pushing down really hard and deep into my abdomen. One could be confused that it may be punishment for being a stubborn laboring pregnant woman in the beginning (jk) but apparently, that's how they ensure everything returns to its normal position. 

She checked three times. 

It kind of felt like I was being stabbed in my gut. No big deal. 

They asked me to rate my pain on a scale of 1-10 following delivery. I answered, "Maybe 2 or 3?" 

I wasn't in pain. Everything was just a little tender and sensitive. The nurse said, “Wow! You amaze me.”

She offered me Tylenol but I refused and said I was ok for right now. I'm one of those people who doesn't take something unless I absolutely need it. In this moment, I didn't think I needed it but I later regretted that decision when I got so uncomfortable sore and couldn't stay asleep. 

What was worse, the bed or the post-birth soreness? 

Honestly, that's a tough answer. They tie. 

We gathered our things and settled into our new room in the recovery unit, where we enjoyed the next 48 hours as a family of three. 

Zac was a pro at changing diapers by the time we left the hospital. He changed every single one. We had a bet going that whoever lost the birth weight guess would change the "first" diaper. I guessed Viviene would weigh 6lbs and Zac guessed 7lbs! The first diaper has a reputation of being a nasty one so he got to experience it first hand as Vivene weighed in at 6lbs, 1 oz. 

Speaking of #2's, I was really scared/skeptical of what my experience would be like in that department following birth, but all went well! 

I attribute my positive experience to a good cup of coffee. After we transitioned to the recovery unit, my sister made a coffee run to Dunkin' and nature took its natural course following that delicious cup of joe. 

That evening, things got a little overwhelming. Viviene was not satisfied with the colostrum she was receiving so she was screaming on and off for several hours! It was so hard to listen to. Finally, I begged the nurse for a formula bottle. They were encouraging me to continue breastfeeding but at this point, my nipples were blistered and bruised from her attempting to feed. I knew she was starving! 

Finally, the nurse returned with a bottle. After a 4-ounce formula bottle, Viviene slept for the next four hours and we were all able to get some much-needed rest. 

Thank you, Baby Jesus! 

That moment was the first of many Mom moments to come where you have to trust your gut and do what's best for you and your baby. I know the nurses have our best interests at heart, but my nipples were SO sore as a result of their advice and it made my first few days of breastfeeding incredibly miserable and painful. 

I GLADLY gave Viviene a combination of breast milk (thank you nipple shields) and formula milk until my milk supply came in three days later. 

48 hours later, and we were discharged and heading home with our new addition. Ah! 

Now, a year later, we're celebrating Viviene's first birthday! 

Time flies!

It's been a wild ride and an exciting year of firsts! You bring so much joy and happiness into our daily lives that we never knew we needed but now know, we could never live without! 

Happy First Birthday, Viviene!